THE FAITH OF OUR CHILDREN

remarks by the Rev. Dr. Tim W. Jensen
at the First Religious Society in Carlisle, Massachusetts
Religious Education Sunday, June 10th 2007

I’ve been thinking a lot about “Family” this past week: and not just my family, but families in general...and also the idea of church as an extended family, or perhaps more accurately, a “family of families.” There’s a reason, you know, that Episcopalians and Roman Catholics call their priests “Father.” And as I mentioned a couple of weeks ago when I lit the candle for my mother, the fact that I have walked this same path with so many other families was a great comfort and resource both to me personally and to my entire family as we shared the experience of my own mother’s final hours.

And this experience has also gotten me thinking again about the the important life lessons we try to teach our children here at FRS. I mean, I think it’s good that our kids understand about “the Circle of Life,” and that every living thing must someday die, and that without this death there can be no new life. But I also realize that sometimes “Grandma has gone to heaven” is a perfectly good explanation of death for children of a certain age, especially if it leaves open the possibility of re-examining what that means as they grow older.

But the plain truth is that Unitarian Universalists have always cared a lot more about ethics than we have metaphysics anyway. The purpose of our Religious Education programs is a lot more about teaching values and moral character than speculating about what happens to us after we
die.

We want our children to know the difference between right and wrong: to understand that we are all responsible for our own behavior, and for the consequences of our choices.

We also want our children to care about other people: to understand that there is more to life than simply getting what we want, and that empathy for others and a willingness to share are essential qualities for getting along with others in community. We want them to understand the Golden Rule: to do unto others as we would have others do unto us.

And in addition to these important lessons about Accountability and Compassion, we also want our children to feel good about who they are -- to have that essential center of Self-Esteem which gives them the confidence, the creativity, and the generosity to become fully-functioning members of a community, and of society as a whole.

And yet in addition to these three important life lessons, we also often add the challenge of instructing our children about their Unitarian Universalist identity. And by this I mean something more than just that Unitarian Universalists are individuals who take responsibility for their own choices, care about other people, and feel good about themselves. Because, lets face it, you could also say these exact same things about the members of a lot of other Faith Traditions.

Rather, I’m talking about things like who Unitarian Universalsits are, and where we come from, what we have in common with other Faith Traditions, and what differentiates us from them...and perhaps most importantly, what it truly MEANS to be active members of a Faith Community, and full participants in a Living Tradition of Memory and Hope.

And these, of course, are important questions not only for children, but also for adults. And yet, it seems to me, that as adults there are very two simple lessons we can teach our children about church which don’t really require a lot of specialized theological education, and yet are essentially important to helping them cultivate a sense of their own religious identity.

And the first of these lessons is that church matters to our family. That it’s something we do together, that it’s something we do regularly, and that it’s something that has a high priority in our lives. Because let’s face facts: 80% of just about everything in life is just showing up. If we are present, we benefit. And if we are absent, we miss out.

And then the second simple lesson is that no matter where you may go or what may happen there, you will always be welcome here, you will always have a home. This is that wonderful lesson from Robert Frost -- that home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in. And yet it seems to me that in addition to accountability and compassion, acceptance and forgiveness are also essential to our faith tradition, and that they are tangibly expressed in our ability to offer hospitality...not only to strangers, but to our estranged family members as well.

I love the opportunity which ministry has given me to be a member of so many families -- to share your sorrows and your joys, and to witness with you so many of the important milestones along the road of life. This year’s graduating Seniors were all Freshmen when I arrived here -- how much you’ve grown in just four short years! And I’ve even started to recognize many of the Trick or Treaters who come to the door of the parsonage at Halloween....

It’s been a great privilege to be included in your lives this way; a great gift you’ve given to me. So even though I’m a little sad that next year at this time someone else will be standing up here in this pulpit, I want you all to know that as much as I have tried to influence your lives for the better though my ministry here, the influence all of you have had on my life has been even more profound. And for that, I will remember you always, and remain eternally grateful....

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